Woods Sprites and Other Mischief

Church of the Planet of the Apes

Recently while traveling I went to an ancient looking Episcopal Church’s Sunday night service.

It was a very, very, Very unusual service.

First I was the only guy – and I had one of the longer haircuts excepting the pianist and serving ladies.

The most conservative parts came from the New Zealand prayer book and then it went strange after that.

The lady priest called for posture & breathing based introspective prayer, which was met either by wide eyed wonderment (myself and a family that had wandered in) or face-withering & bawling.

The lesson, components, and even the Lord’s Prayer were paraphrased heavily – I think to the point the meanings were highly changed and so PC nuanced as to distract from the messages intended (or perhaps seeing the neo-pagan witherfest going on real meanings were not intended?)

Really weird apologetic comments in the lesson to elevate other religions as equally valid, and Christ as just one “maybe equal” path.

Rather seemed to be apologizing for being Christians.

Though the lady Reverend had apparently preconsecrated the sacraments, the eucharist part was done by another woman, who made a point of not serving the sacraments, but leaving it lay available on a faux-rough hewn table.

There was some sort of “interesting angle” to this lady doing this which escaped me – as they were talking afterwards half in code about it.

Some Taize music and some “pop charts.”

The lack of any other male was significant, and the I think I would have put people more at ease if I had said something like “I was female in my last reincarnation, really I was…” or something odd to fit in.

Nice people, but bizarre service and undertow. When the overlaid style blocks out the message & meaning I’m rather lost why even hold a service – would prefer personal prayers rather than pretending to be part of the set for some off-broadway play abut people who once had religious faith.

Pretty telling that wander-ins outnumbered those from the parish – this was low church run amuck – reminded me of the scene in Planet of the Apes where God had been substituted by a Nuclear Bomb.

In this case Political Correctness as a style was the nuclear bomb, and Christ was an onlooker to a lost ritual.

Thought you’d all find it interesting!



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